How to Win Friends and Influence People in the Digital Age (Dale Carnegie Books)

Be engaging in conversations

Instructions

Ensure you contribute positively to conversations.
When you talk to others, either online or face-to-face, think carefully about the words you use. Your words can influence thoughts, change feelings, and impact situations, much like influential historical figures whose words have lasting effects. Ask yourself: Are my words helpful or hurtful? Do they offer support or criticism? Am I adding value to the conversation or just airing grievances? This kind of self-reflection can prevent conflicts and create a more positive atmosphere for communication.
Affirm the positive qualities of others.
Affirming the good in others is a powerful way to foster positive relationships and encourage more of the behaviors and qualities you value. Actively look for opportunities to acknowledge and appreciate the positive aspects and achievements of people around you. For example, if a colleague delivers excellent work on a project, explicitly commend their skills and dedication. If a friend consistently supports you, tell them how much you value their kindness. It will strengthen your bond with them!
Align with the core desires of others when making decisions that involve them.
Effectively influencing the decisions and behaviors of others starts with a deep understanding of their fundamental desires. To better understand the people around you, start by dedicating a few minutes each week to engage in conversations that focus on discovering what drives them. For example, you could ask a team member, "What part of your work are you most passionate about?" or a friend, "What's something you feel is missing in your life right now?" Document these insights and review them when planning interactions or making decisions that involve others.